Arranged Marriages in India

Delhi,

Arranged marriage has always been a debatable subject. It is the major outlook on relationships that Indians are immensely different, in the way they perceive the institution of marriage, to those beliefs of the Western culture. The majority of people have a major misunderstanding of the topic of arranged marriages and have a fairly negative attitude regarding them, as I did. However, when I began to put aside my own beliefs, opinions, and preconceived ideas I began to understand the reasoning behind such cultures.

 In India, 95 percent of young Indian couples still have their marriages arranged. Most westerners cannot imagine marrying someone they do not love. On the other hand, arranged marriage is not something young Indians fight against or protest. In many cases, arranged marriage is preferred among Indians. Arranged marriage in India is not based on feelings, but rather on commitment and couples feel that as their marriage progresses, the feelings develop. It’s something to be fostered and created throughout a lifetime. Also marriage is not perceived as a relationship between two people, but as a relationship between families.

Usually, the burden for the arrangement of the marriage is on the parents and it’s the father’s responsibility to choose and make the arrangements for a husband for his daughter.  It may seem like an easy task for a father to arrange his daughter’s marriage, but there are a number of factors considered such as marrying within ones own social group, astrology, and a lot of investigation. It’s one of the biggest responsibilities Indian parents face.

To Indians, arranged marriage has it’s practical points such as a divorce rate of 2 percent versus 50 percent or more in other parts of the world where “love” marriages end in divorce. This isn’t to say this is evidence that arranged marriages are better or more successful, but it’s important to realize that just as in “love” marriages, it may not be right for everyone, and not all work well, but they should not be confused and associated with other social issues like domestic violence, dowry or women’s rights.

“Love” marriages do happen in India, but it isn’t the norm.

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